webuiltthisfourtris: i just want john green to be my english teacher
bucklesup: my health teacher asked for different ways to prevent pregnancy and i said “do it in the butt” and i got extra credit because no one has ever said that before
wittneyhancockisatlarge asked: So now I have to stalk both blogs on a regular basis? You ask so much of me...
wittneyhancockisatlarge asked: Since when do you go by zellajaynee again?
falenir: having feelings for people will ruin you and you will die
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey: cumanana: jephry: if someone was covered in paper cuts and you threw them into a pool of lemon juice how long do you think it would take them to die jesus what circle of dante’s inferno did you crawl out of
metaphorically: i was crying in my car in front of the mcdonalds near my house eating french fries and listening to my sad playlist in the car and a black guy tapped on my window and just gave me life changing advice “its going to be ok lil nigga you can do it”
west2spookycollins: i’m not saying i’m batman but answer me this have you ever seen me and batman in the same room
When you go into the ER, one of the first things they ask you to do is rate your...– The Fault In Our Stars (via mischiefwinsthewars)
-hewastheirfriend: #thiS MAKES ME EXTREMELY...
I'm really not looking forward to this week.
Like. At all.
imnotocake: do you ever just want to redecorate your bedroom and change your hair and all your clothes and completely reinvent yourself but then realise it takes time and money then retreat to your bed and hate who you are
me: this book brutally ripped out my heart and tore it to shreds then stomped it into the ground as i drowned in a sea of my tears and basked in eternal sorrow
me: here read it
I'm in a Savage Garden mood.
OOH I WANT YOU I DON’T KNOW IF I NEED BUT OOH I’M DYIN’ TO FIND OUT.
WHAT’S UP LADY CARDS’ WINNING STREAK? I dislike most of the snooty bitches on my team, but we’re fucking awesome, man. No joke.
Dear Bitch on my team who thinks she’ll be taking my spot as starting forward, You’re wrong. Fuck off. Sincerely, Everyone on the team
I go to a Catholic school, and one day every week, we have to go to mass, so every student has to wear a red polo and a pair of khakis as part of the dress code. Today, when my friends and I went to KFC for lunch, the cashier looked at us and said, “So do you all work at the same place or what?” My friend told him, “Yeah, we all work at state farm.”
Hi, I’m Hazel, and I’m the Lady Cardinals’ newest stARTING CENTER FORWARD. EXCUSE ME WITH I DIE OMG.
School starts tomorrow. My senior year. It’s weird to think about. I’m a senior in high school. Like, holy shit. I had an awesome summer though. Drama and surgery and roadtrips and car accidents and new friends and new experiences and a new chapter for my life story. A new place to start. A shiny new beginning. I’m happy.
My head is going to explode.
cool-craig:veronicamarsissmarterthanme:hadeonmehader: same This skit was perfect. flaw free Because this is never not funny.